He looked at me like I had lost my mind as I questioned him about whether or not low-fat ice cream was an acceptable dinner choice. Apparently it’s not… to my extreme disappointment. How on earth did I, the worlds biggest ice cream fanatic, end up sitting across the worlds most muscly man discussing a nutritional plan for the rest of my life? Let’s rewind a little bit!
When I was 14 I remember my ballet instructor pulling me aside and counseling me. He explained, not being able to nail my triple pirouette that day wasn’t my fault, my body was changing and my balance was shifting. But it was a “natural thing” so not to worry. How could I not worry? I did not sign up for this! I pulled my dress over my head and slipped into my little flats as I trotted out the building to my waiting mom. I remember getting home, slipping out of my dress and looking down, seeing soft curves under my leotard where there had always been agile leanness. From that moment onwards I was determined to hide my “blossoming” as much as possible, even going as far as wearing 2 sport bras all the time, even to bed, because maybe if I tried hard enough they would go away. But they didn’t.
Fast forwarding to my adult life, I have witnessed the body positive movement rise in popularity and agree so wholeheartedly that no matter what size you are you should love and respect the wonderful thing that is your body. But somewhere along the way I seemed to have bought into the idea that loving your body is more important than giving it what it needs nutritionally. For example I considered eating a giant cinnamon roll and 6 cups of coffee a decent idea because no matter what, I was committed to loving myself and love is unconditional right? There I was with curves I didn’t necessarily want and an unimpressive idea of how to feed my body.
My solution for the fluffiness that was beginning to creep into my life? Naturally, go and murder myself in the gym.
I’ve spent the last 6 months of my life living in the gym. I cried the first time I went because wandering around looking lost in a primarily male gym isn’t exactly my cup of tea, but I kept going.
in the middle of the night…
in London, I was getting my sweat on.
Last week I dropped to the floor of the plane to show off my new party trick, doing 10 “man-push-ups” for the federal air marshal on my flight. Safe to say his jaw was solidly on the floor for a few minutes. Which leads us to the moment I met with my training mentor to go over the last piece of the puzzle for my fitness journey. Apparently ice-cream+cinnamon rolls+coffee does not = abs.
But let me be clear about something incredibly important, there is no “ideal body”. Even if I eat spinach every day for the rest of my life, genetically I’ll still have a certain shape. I’m okay with that, I’m not trying to be Heidi Klum, what I am trying to be is the best, most healthy version of myself so that I can live as long as I possibly can. Okay now that we have that out there… back to our regular broadcast!
I expected to hate every second of this change. To have every fiber of my being resist this healthy new lifestyle and could already envision myself sneaking whole cakes at 2 in the morning. But surprise!!! It’s going incredibly!!! I love feeling so control of my health and being able to eat every 3 hours, foods that are truly energizing my body. I’m in this for the long haul and am looking forward to sharing with y’all healthy tips and tricks while traveling and seeing my body transform. But for now I have to go because drinking a gallon of water/day doesn’t leave me much time to sit around if yaaaaa know what I mean.